To fully understand this, we need to go to the core of a horses' psyche. Horses are vegetarian, they are prey, and if we keep this in mind when we are trying to interact at every level of our relationship, then we will begin to understand why he does the things he does in reaction to what we do.
Think about how you approach your horse, are you being a predator? Lets look at an example...
My pony stallion. I purchased him when he was seven months old. He'd never had a halter on, never been handled. I spent about an hour haltering, teaching him the basics of how to follow me, and finally loaded him on a trailer and took him home. I turned him out in a giant field and then proceeded to gain his trust...it took four days before I could "catch" him, I spent numerous calories and was exhausted by the end of each session, because he was fast! What I learned at the end of it all, was priceless...and here's how I finally got him:
In the four days I had intent to "catch" him, I was a predator. I would walk out into the field with a halter, chase him into a corner and try to get hold of him. This obviously didn't work! Finally, I realized that he was just scared and what happened when I realized that is quite close to miraculous.
My final attempt I walked out into the field with no halter and sat down in the middle of the best patch of grass (where he spent most of his time grazing), I "grazed" for a while (ie. picked grass and made a nice pile) and his own curiosity or the smell of the fresh picked grass got the better of him. He began to approach...I watched him out of the corner of my eye, not making eye contact, and continued just sitting there talking quietly to him. He mustered up the nerve to graze close to his favorite grassy spot, and slowly came in close enough to sniff me and I let him poke at me and sniff me until he began to graze again. That's when I began to move. At first it was just to pick more grass, then I got up to my knees, always keeping the low mumbling words of encouragement to him, he tensed and relaxed several times during this process, but soon became desensitized to it. When he was completely relaxed with my movements, I moved away and sat about 10 feet from him. He moved with me. I continued this little game of pick grass, move away, sit and pick grass again, for about another 30 or 40 feet and then I stood up and moved away the next 10 feet or so by walking away. He followed, so I took the opportunity to continue my "walk". I walked around the whole field, stopping to do little things, adjusting my boot lace, picking some weeds, picking up stones, and all the while talking to him. As we made our loop around the field, he began to come in closer to me, walking in my shadow and he was so close I could reach out to touch him, I started to slightly move my arm toward him, keeping my hands low, I rubbed him with my elbow on the neck/shoulder, he came closer, seemingly wanting my closeness, wanting to feel my touch. Finally, I stopped in the middle of the field and keeping my hand low, I let my fingers gently massage his shoulder and then moved my way up to his withers for a little scratch. I am sure I had him at that scratch! Watch horses in a field, as they groom each other, it is pleasurable for them, and it's part of the herd way of life...If you offer a scratch to a timid horse they soon become relaxed and will get into it. The rest of this story is the beginning of a 20+ year friendship with my stallion. He followed me right up to the shelter that day, no halter or lead rope. And from that day forward he would gallop full speed in from the field to greet me when I came to the fence. He is still just as easy to "catch" anywhere...just call him and he comes full speed!
Herd dynamics: You must become part of your horses herd, not the predator...
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